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patmk · Posted: Sun Aug 09, 2009 10:33 pm Post subject: Animal Diaries

every animal has something to teach us. Whether it's true, I don't know, but it's a beautiful thought. Maybe the pets we choose tell us something about ourselves.

bExcerpts from a Dog's Daily Diary
8:00 am - Dog food! My favourite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favourite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favourite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favourite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favourite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favourite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favourite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favourite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favourite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favourite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favourite thing!
Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary
Day 983 of my captivity.

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow--but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released--and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so it is safe.

For now. . . .

_________________
We Are The Borg! You Will Be Assimilated! Resistance Is Futile

quarryman · Joined: 14 Dec 2006 Posts: 417 Location: Sligo

Dog owner... I mean two canine companion animals live with us.... I mean we live with them.....

patmk · Posted: Sun Aug 09, 2009 11:05 pm Post subject:

has your cats trained you to feed them and do all the other jobs they dont like to do yet
_________________
We Are The Borg! You Will Be Assimilated! Resistance Is Futile

blowin · Posted: Thu Aug 13, 2009 12:05 am Post subject:

Yep !
And the dog manipulates us better by telepathy and body language than we control him by cajoling and commands .
Have to go now .......... he wants to go out ...... again !

patmk · Posted: Sat Aug 15, 2009 8:02 pm Post subject:

hurry up or you will be sorry

_________________
We Are The Borg! You Will Be Assimilated! Resistance Is Futile